Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life
Cognitive Frameworks
PERMANENCE
Permanent (Pessimistic)
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Temporary (Optimistic)
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I’m all washed up
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I’m exhausted tonight
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You always nag
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You nag when I don’t clean my room
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Permanent (Optimistic)
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Temporary (Pessimistic)
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I’m good with people
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I was good with people at that event
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I’m smart
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I studied a lot for that one exam
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Universal (Pessimistic)
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Specific (Optimistic)
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All teachers are unfair
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Mr. Smith is unfair
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I’m ugly
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I’m ugly to her
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Universal (Optimistic)
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Specific (Pessimistic)
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I’m charming
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I was charming to her
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I’m hardworking
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I had a lot of energy that day
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Internal (Pessimistic)
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External (Optimistic)
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I’m stupid
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That test was unfair
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I have no talent in poker
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I have no luck in poker
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Internal (Optimistic)
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External (Pessimistic)
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My skill helped us win
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Our team’s skill helped us win
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I’m very focused
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There were no distractions today
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Cognitive Therapy Tactics
- Recognize Automatic thoughts and describe the permanence, pervasiveness, and personalization
- Dispute Automatic thought with evidence to contradict initial thought
- Learn to avoid depressing thoughts or ruminating
- Recognize and question the assumptions you live by (e.g. I need X or else I am a failure)
A study of insurance sales agents at Metlife showed that employees scoring highest on optimistic scale tended to outperform peers who scored higher on the career test. While there is always a place for optimism, pessimism tends to be better grounded in reality and is necessary for certain types roles (i.e. risk, quality, accounting).
In sports, typically, if everything else is equal, the more optimistic player will win. In high pressure situations, pessimistic players tend to give up while optimistic players tend to push harder. Coaches should keep in mind that Optimism is not something everyone knows about intuitively; Optimism can tell you when to play certain players; Optimism tells you who you should recruit; and You can train pessimists to become optimists.
Analysis of politician’s explanatory style has shown to have some predictive power.
When you encounter a pessimistic thought use the ABCDE method. Pessimistic explanations set off passivity while optimistic explanations energize. When pessimistic thoughts occur you can distract yourself or dispute. Disputation is better in the long-run and the main tool on changing your view on adversity. Pull together evidence that disputes your thoughts and reframe your thinking. Distance yourself from your thoughts and understand that your thoughts may not be an accurate reflection of you. Just because you believe something, doesn’t make it true.
- Adversity – Examine what happened
- Belief – How did you interpret it
- Consequences – Feelings and actions
- Dispute – Argue with yourself on why you may be wrong
- Energize – Think about how you feel after successfully dealing with beliefs
- Tell yourself to stop!
- Concentrate on some object with intense concentration engage all your senses
- Tell yourself you will think about it later
- Write down as it occurs
- Evidence – This is not just about positive thinking. It is about accuracy.
- Alternatives – Almost nothing has one cause. Focus on the changeable, specific, and non-personal causes.
- Implications – Decatastrophize. Even if you are correct, what will be the result?
- Usefulness – Ask yourself if the thought serves you in any way.
Flexible Optimism
Two methods to reduce the impacts of these trends are moral jogging and learned optimism (the topic of this book). Moral jogging is putting off short-term fulfillment of the ego for long-term fulfillment. Doing this is actually good for yourself. While optimism has many benefits, you must learn to practice Flexible optimism based on when it is required. Pessimism is very important since it grounds us to reality and keeps us accountable.
- Give away 5% of income to a charity personally. You must interview, give it out, and follow its use
- Give up some activity and spend it on something devoted to others or the community: soup kitchen, school-board campaign, etc.
- When approached by a homeless person, talk to them and try to judge if will use for a nondestructive purpose and if so give to them.
- Write letters to people you praise and critical letters to people you are not happy about
- Teach your children to give things away
I don’t like self help at all, but I thought I give a chance to this post – when I read the comparison between the thinking patterns of pessimists and optimists it reminded to Cognitive Behavioural Therapy so I continued reading your post and then I realised that it is indeed CBT!!! It is a really helpful tool and it made wonders on my perception after I suffered from psychosis.
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Happy to hear that. Thanks for sharing!
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